if I were a boy

hey y'all!! so today was just a decent day. this morning I went for a run which was nice actually. except usually when I go for runs I end up walking for a few blocks, then jogging again, then walking, jogging, walking....well you get it. ok then I started reading The Help outside which was super fun. so far it is a grrrreat book! I've seen the movie which was awesome but the book is equally as satisfying. and then I went out to dinner with my momma and my brother in Lagrange (I LOVE Lagrange if I haven't mentioned that in previous blogs...I often find myself hanging out there with friends, frequently at Red Mango or just sittin having heart to hearts at the fountain) and some cool people live in Lagrange too! (you know who you are) ;) so ya dinner was nice until afterwards, my mom brought up how she thinks it would be totally normal for me to go with my ex boyfriend to Homecoming. no mom, I don't think that's a good idea since we aren't exactly dating. her rationale is that friends go together and since I claim to be friends with my ex, it wouldn't be weird. ya I'd have to disagree. then my brother brought up how maybe someone else would ask me and she so kindly replied, "your sister doesn't have many guy friends..." OH HEY THANKS MOTHER YOU'RE A GEM! ;)  I think it might be better for me to go solo (which is exactly what is going to happen) then to go with him. the sad thing is that she is totally right. I have an older brother, so I like to pretend that I understand guys. I try not to be awkward around them, but I think that maybe I scare them away?  I'm friendly with guys, but I've always wanted atleast one close guy friend to talk to and hang out with and such. I guess since I had a boyfriend for 3 1/2 years I didn't really have time to have a best guy friend since I didn't want to make him jealous, but at the same time, I don't know if I would've even been able to find a suitable guy friend. I'm currently working on it with this one really cool guy (who also happens to be cute so that's not so bad), but the sad thing is that I only met him cause of my ex bf...so ya that's just sad. but he's still cool so that makes it better. but why couldn't I have found him on my own like a big girl?! fail. on another note...I'm pretty much clueless when it comes to having relationships with guys too. I mean I did a good job with my boyfriend I think but then I kinda missed out on having crushes and such since I was with the same guy for so long. its not that I didn't like having a boyfriend, cause I did. I loved feeling loved and having attention and always having someone to turn to. but at the same time I did sorta miss thinking that guys found me attractive and stuff. cause that just does NOT happen. in middle school I don't think any guys liked me considering I was that giant girl that was loud and awkward and such. so now I'm single (3 months woo!) and it's not that I miss dating my ex bf, cause I don't. but like I said, I selfishly liked the attention. so then I find myself talking to random guys to make me feel better. but like my best friend always tells me, the only people who truly know me and can love me are my girlfriends. which brings me to the point of this blog...guys confuse me so much!!! and I feel like they would only make sense to me if I were a boy myself. that being said, today's song is "If I Were a Boy" by Beyonce. Beyonce is just so so so fierce and powerful and I feel like she just does NOT let guys faze her. so I'm channeling my inner Beyonce from now on...ok so here it is....

If I Were a Boy


If I were a boy even just for a day
I'd roll out of bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted
And go drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I'd kick it with who I wanted
And I'd never get confronted for it
'Cause they stick up for me
If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man

I'd listen to her
'Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
'Cause he's taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it's broken
So they'd think that I was sleeping alone

I'd put myself first
And make the rules as I go
'Cause I know that she'd be faithful
Waiting for me to come home, to come home

If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I'd be a better man
I'd listen to her
'Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
'Cause he's taking you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

It's a little too late for you to come back
Say it's just a mistake
Think I'd forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong

But you're just a boy
You don't understand
And you don't understand, oh
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you wish you were a better man

You don't listen to her
You don't care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
'Cause you're taking her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you're just a boy

alrighty so for my ladies reading this blog...YOU GO GIRL! cause just like "King of Anything"...that's how this song makes me feel. but at the same time, it is sorta sad. cause I'm sure (atleast I hope) that not at all guys are annoying and take girls for granted. but then you find a nice, cute guy and clearly flirt with him and then he's either clueless or he doesn't like you. I just can't wait till I can grow up and fall in love like a fool in the movies and books and get married. but then again I know that that is probably extremely unrealistic and that makes me sad. and then I feel bad because I judge guys for judging girls...but then again girls do the exact same thing to guys! and girls can be so dramatic (myself included) and I feel bad for guys to have to figure us out! so I think that it would be awesome for guys and girls to be able to switch roles for a little bit. cause I know that if I were a boy, I'd treat a girl with respect, call her beautiful instead of hot, and try to make her laugh. cause girls just wanna feel loved but they don't wanna be seen as an object. and I vow to try to do the same for guys (even though Channing Tatum's abs are so so so yummy...but I'm sure he has a great heart too <3 ) so anyways...let's try to learn about the opposite sex (tehehehe that is a silly word) and realize that they are equally as confused about us as we are about them. If I've learned anything from talking to rando boys, it'd be that guys are very chill and sometimes are oblivious too. but it's all good cause hopefully someday I'll find someone awesome and I'll be happy it'll be all good! plus I've only be single for 3 months....oh boy. so I'm gonna just stick with ma girls for awhile until the next cute boy comes around to distract me and Julie will have to reign me back in. moral of the blog...1) GIRLS RULE, BOYS DROOL. 2) stick with yo girlfrandz cause they got your back! (if you're a boy reading this by chance...sorry. I guess stick with your bros, unless you wanna hang out with me cause that's cool too! especially if you're cute....haha no jk. but actually.....) 3) QUIT JUDGING PEOPLE BY THEIR BODIES! (even though it is super easy to get distracted by Channing's yumminess) nighty night children!


<3 <3 <3
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